Four years ago, I sat in the East Islip High School auditorium hardly listening to the speech that was being given to incoming 9th graders. To me, all I heard was warnings of the grave expectations of high school, about the terrifying (to the eighth grade version of me) challenges we may face, and about why it is imperative to experiment in hard classes and to join after school activities you may not have seen yourself doing.
Although my ears were not fully open to the lecture, one thing I remember is “challenge yourself…. get out of your comfort zone.” It has been stuck in my brain all these years later.
According to psychiatrist Abigail Brenner, a comfort zone is an emotional way our brains imply safety, security, and calmness, while being free from anxiety and worry. In a metaphorical sense – imagine your comfort zone is a large fluffy warm blanket, in the midst of winter. If I am freezing there is no way I am taking that comfy blanket off! Yet I must not waste the day, and once I stand up and move around, I will feel warm again. I know I will shiver and get goosebumps, but they do not last forever.
In this scenario, the “day” is your life, and getting out of your comfort zone is the “shivers” and “goosebumps” that go away with time.
After I recently discovered how unfortunate staying in a comfort zone is, I opened my eyes to how much of my life – even at sixteen years old – is typically lived in a comfortable bubble. I started mentally forcing myself to get used to uncomfortable situations, to let myself feel anxious, instead of shying away from things that worried me. This idea led me to notice that it is not the end of the world to try new things. I relaxed to the fact that my future will not implode from one decision that I make.
I once awaited the feeling of failure, embarrassment, and judgement after popping my bubble of safety, but after time passes, those negative feelings fade, and are replaced by growth as a person and confidence in yourself. The more you do something the less scary it becomes.
Whether you realize it or not, this emotional security blanket has become a massive problem in school classrooms. I often notice people around me nervous to speak aloud, present a project, or even ask questions when confused. In full honesty, I am sometimes guilty of all of the above. Teenagers worrying about sounding dumb when asking a question or answering a question wrong is absurd! I believe that students should be encouraged to be wrong and sound silly sometimes. High school is a place to learn and make as many mistakes as possible, not a place where young adults are afraid to be human.
“I love doing things that are out of my comfort zone, it makes me feel alive,” explains East Islip Junior, Lauren Winiarski. “I don’t always have fun, but I always am like ‘I’m glad I did that or tried that.’ There’s never been a time where I’ve gotten out of my comfort zone and said ‘I wish I hadn’t done that.’”
To Dr. Costa, an Italian teacher at East Islip High School, getting out of your comfort zone is something he really wants his students to understand.
“Trying new things and getting out of your comfort zone is how you grow as a student and as a person,” he stated. “It prepares you for your future challenges that you will eventually be experiencing throughout your adult life.”
Despite students repeatedly hearing to challenge themselves, most teenagers don’t. This includes people who often stay within their comfort zone when it comes to school courses and joining (or not joining) extracurricular activities.
As Chris Martin, the lead singer of Coldplay says in their song Fix You, “If you never try, you’ll never know.”
Many are discouraged from challenging classes due to the difficulty, but this is not the mindset that should be applied to these types of courses. One should step out of their comfort zone, and learn to adapt. Besides becoming acquainted with more academically challenging materials, students may meet new people and create connections with someone who they never thought would be their friend. Perhaps by challenging yourself, you might succeed and surpass your expectations. What if taking that one challenging class made you realize you are so much more capable than you thought?
You don’t have to be good at something to begin, and you do not have to be an expert at something to love it. This applies to almost every aspect of life, both in school and outside of school. You can use this ideology with extracurricular activities, such as sports and clubs. Don’t let your lack of experience discourage you from beginning something. Who knows what you will take away from the experience?
Start with something small: a hello to someone you do not know, a raised hand in a difficult class, or maybe a tryout for a sport you have never done before! Before you know it, you will be in college or maybe an adult with kids. If you take this advice, your life will be filled with new experiences and dreams you deemed unreachable.
The longer you are out from under the warm soft cozy blanket of your comfort zone, the more you feel at home in your regular un-blanketed skin. The chills and shivers will cease eventually, and you will become used to what used to be scary.
